HALLOWEEN IS supposed to be fun. You get to dress up, go out, and generally enjoy the ~spookiness~ of October 31. That’s fun, right?
For some people, though, Halloween is a stressful time. These are their stories.
1. The actual effort of putting together a costume
You say you’ll be sorted by the end of September, but there you are in Penneys on October 30, sweating. Where are the cat ears?
And if you want to get to a special costume shop, well…
2. And if you love dressing up, the actual effort of convincing your mates to join you
You: “Hey guys, just tipped a bucket of fake blood over my head for my Carrie costume. Everyone’s dressing up, right?”
Everyone: “Actually…”
3. For the jumpy people amongst us, it’s a real test
Horror movie marathons, haunted houses, creepily realistic costumes… If you scare easily, you might as well hibernate for the month.
4. Bangers and fireworks are rife
Should you be wary of that pile of youths there on the corner? Or will they lob a banger at you? (They’ll definitely lob a banger at you.)
5. Dog owners are up in a heap
Pups across the country are being forced into tiny Halloween costumes and THEN scared silly by bangers. It’s just not fair.
6. The pubs and clubs are packed
You can’t just ‘go out’ on Halloween night. You have to have a watertight course of action that involves at least a Plan B, C, and D for when it inevitably goes wrong.
7. You can trust no one
https://vine.co/v/epP2TqJhqQY
It’s like April Fools’ Day, all over again. Are your mates planning a prank to scare the bejaysus out of you? They very well could be.
8. If you’re a parent, you have to find a good costume for your kids
And you can increasingly understand why your own parents stuck you in a binbag.
9. Pumpkin carving is hard, yo
You spend a few hours trying not to hack your own fingers off, and this is all you have to show for it.
10. And if you forget the sweets for the trick-or-treaters, you are DONE
You might as well be a prisoner in your own home.
Turn all the lights off, and try not to think about all those tiny children in their tiny costumes, yelling outside your door… *shudders*
