AS THE YEARS go on, our Christmas habits and traditions develop. Maybe when you were younger, it was all about lighting the candle in the window, getting new Christmas pyjamas and pulling crackers around the dinner table.
But we’re diversifying. Here are a few traditions that probably weren’t around in your grandparents’ day.
1. Starting in September
Yes, this happened on the 1st of September in a Celbridge branch in Tesco. It’s now custom to begin getting into the holiday spirit before Halloween has even arrived.
2. Doing the 12 pubs
The Christmas pub crawl is the perfect mesh of Irish life and Christmas tradition. We all have a ‘date’ we’re doing it on, sometimes more than once. Only the fittest survive. Try doing this 40 years ago and you’d be shunned from the parish. It also spawned the tradition of those complaining about it incessantly.
3. Putting up ‘Santa stop here’ signs
Has Santa lost his sense of direction? No, he’s not going a bit senile. He’s magic, kids, he can find your house and he’ll totally stop there.
4. Wearing Christmas jumpers
They’re unsightly, they’re comfy, they were ironic. They’re not anymore, but has that stopped anyone from wearing them? No. Wear those jumpers, ignore the nay-sayers. We all know they’re just jealous of your super quirky quirk. Game, on.
See also: Christmas onesies.
5. The ever-evolving Christmas dinner
Christmas dinner back in the day was STANDARD. Now you order it all weeks in advance, and it’s all nut roast this, duck d’orange that. There are even glitter drinks available for consumption. Drinks with actual glitter.
Three bird roast? What’s wrong with the one?
If it’s a cranberry and orange marinated scottish lochmuir salmon you want?
At least dessert will always be Christmas pud. With mulled spice cream is it? NOTIONS.
6. Supermarket Christmas sandwiches for lunch
On a similar note, this development that was practically inconceivable in the days when mammy would slave over the Christmas feast, ensuring every juice and stock didn’t go to waste. Put it in between bread? Like all of it? Have fun burning in hell. Sure they’ll be liquidising the pudding next.
7. Going ‘away’ for the holidays
Some Irish families don’t even entertain the thought of staying at home for Christmas. Sure we’ll go to a nice hotel. Is there anything that could be worse than having Christmas dinner in a hotel as a kid? No. No there isn’t.
8. Drinking fancy coffee
Honeycomb caramel gingerbread mochas with a dusting of cinnamon and black forest powder. In a red cup, of course.
9. Attending a midnight mass before midnight
Not a recent development by a long shot, but now it starts at about 7pm. Hey. It’s not Christmas, it’s Christmas Eve mass. Where’s your sense of Catholic guilt?
What’s worse is when baby Jesus is already in the church crib. Blasphemy.
10. Tuning into Christmas FM
Every year, as you tune into the test broadcast, that initial flicker that Christmas is REALLY coming hits you fast. Fairytale of New York just doesn’t sound the same on any other radio station.
11. Going on an ice-skating excursion
Winter Wonderlands and Christmas fairs. Are you able? We’re not. Now a staple for school trips.
