EVERY WEEKDAY MORNING, the Daily Edge digs through the celebrity dirt to bring you the best of it. Here’s The Dredge…

Kim Kardashian has said she wouldn’t mind trading places with Jesus, you know? But just for a day, because his life wasn’t very… sparkly.

Asked who she’d switch lives with for 24 hours, she named the Messiah because “it would be fascinating to see the power”. (Radar)

Speaking of power, there are reports that Kanye West has requested that Kim fit herself into his new clothing line and generally “get a supermodel body”. How, you ask? Well, by consuming only “lemon juice, cayenne pepper and maple syrup,” of course. (OMG)

Kim told reporters that in relationships, “you have to trust your gut.” (BANG Showbiz)

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The Words

Disgusting: What gay men are according to Paris Hilton, who added helpfully that “most of them probably have Aids.” She was recorded in a New York cab giving her theory on homosexuality, although she has since apologised. The little chat was prompted by a discussion of the gay hookup app Grindr, which later tweeted a photo of her with a man dressed as a fairy. (Radar)

She’s so sorry. (Czarek Sokolowski/AP/Press Association Images)

Sierra Blanca: The Texas town with a track record of arresting touring musicians as they pass through, which has made Fiona Apple its latest victim. Apple was arrested after a small amount of cannabis was found on her tour bus – following in the Sierra Blanca footsteps of Willie Nelson, Snoop Dogg and, er, Armie Hammer. (Daily Edge)

Like, totally busted. (JEFF CHRISTENSEN/AP/Press Association Images)

Every day: The frequency with which Tom Cruise calls his daughter Suri, according to a spokesperson. Sometimes twice a day! It’s just that Tom is in England at the moment shooting a film – and partying with Benicio del Toro and Tara Reid – and can’t be there in person. OK? (E! Online, Perez)

Such a great dad. (Tammie Arroyo/AFF-USA.COM/UK Press/Press Association Images)

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The Dirt

Kerry Katona hasn’t had sex in months, and hasn’t even got a sex toy. So now. (The Sun)

Lady GaGa has responded to worldwide coverage of her, er, weight gain by saying she ate some delicious food. (Mail Online)

Lindsay Lohan probably won’t be charged over that little hit-and-run thing. (Radar)

Rihanna went to a strip club, covered a stripper in money, then took a photo. (Twitter)

One Direction’s new video is out, and they take their tops off. EVERYBODY ON LOCKDOWN:

YouTube/OneDirectionVEVO

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The Barrel Scraper

There is literally an app for that. (AT40)