IF THERE’S SOMETHING genuinely strange or wrong with a product or service, who are you going to call?
Customer Service. Right?
However, actually getting to speak to another human being about your problem isn’t always as easy at it sounds.
Here are all the hellish stages you go through when trying to contact Customer Service over the phone:
Finding a number for them in the first place can be a real challenge
You’re forced to sit through five minutes of pre-recorded messages telling you why you don’t need to call them at all
Giving information to the automated recording system is impossible
When you finally make it to a menu, the option you need is NEVER there
You foolishly go for the next best thing and end up trapped in a useless menu, so you have to hang up and start all over again
When you finally get back on track you have to sit through that same old hold music
You’re given a false sense of hope when the terrible looping track stops briefly and you think someone’s going to talk to you
But it’s actually just this incredibly annoying message
When you finally get through you’re asked for information you never even knew you needed
And may have to explain any name that isn’t Mary Brown or Jim Murphy
One of you tries to make small talk while information is processing, but it fails miserably and things just get awkward
If they can’t solve your problem you may be passed to someone else and have to explain everything all over again from the very beginning
Be asked this infamous question
Or alternatively be told ’yeah, we’re not able to do that. Would you like this instead?’
And you may end up completely losing the rag with the unfortunate individual at the other end of the line
Heaven help the poor souls – we’re sure working in customer service is just as difficult.
In fairness, some do end up offering some fantastic advice, or being incredibly helpful when we ask idiotic questions.