1. This pencil sharpener that wants to be given more responsibility in the workplace
2. This urinal that thinks, you know, I’m doing a really important job here and what credit do I get?
3. This belly containing the magic of a new life
4. Edith from Downton Abbey, who was tragically jilted at the altar
5. This fearsome killer tiger
6. This button which if people knew how many LIVES it had saved, might get a little more respect
8. These household objects which serve an important function, and you’d miss them if they were gone
9. This classic novel riven with sadness at the inherent tragedy of the American dream
10. This puffer fish in Mongolia’s natural history museum, which you may not realise has an crucial place in the ecosystem, and who knows where we’d be without it?
11. The founding president of the United States of America
12. This pie which actually is feeling really unwell, not that anyone probably cares
13. Derren Brown
14. This newborn child, freshly arrived into a world of wonder
15. This perfectly good fresco