IT’S THAT TIME of year again.
While it’s pretty much universally agreed that January can be the grimmest month (credit card bills waft in your letterbox, rain reigns, no one’s any craic, your nose is running, etcetera, etcetera), it’s also the time that people start thinking about booking their holidays.
It’s the light at the end of the tunnel. A little something to look forward to during the daily grind. HOLIDAY! CELEBRATE!
1. “I really shouldn’t”
You haven’t even got the Christmas excesses paid off yet. It’s not time to be thinking about the summer holidays. “Cop on to yourselves,” you mutter as you pass a billboard advertising Gran Canaria.
2. “Ah, sure, I’m only looking”
Ah, what harm in there in looking, though? Just a little look. No one has to know. Idle curiosity, is all it is. Just a little, tiny, squinchy look at what’s out there.
3. “Well… Maybe I could afford that”
Idle curiosity has turned to definite daydreaming. You’ve checked what weeks might work, if the hotel is available, if your partner has enough leave. You’re browsing with intent, pal.
4. “I could afford that! (If I didn’t eat lunch for three months)”
OK, so if I bring a packed lunch to work every day, cycle instead of the bus, and sell two of the more annoying kids, I can definitely afford this.
5. “This is too goddamn hard”
If you’re booking a holiday with friends, the organisation part can be pure hell. If you’re in charge of booking it, it can feel like herding a gang full of dead-eyed cows into a field with a fence that won’t quite shut. If you’re part of that herd, then you’re probably raging with how bossy the organising friend is being. IT’S LOSE/LOSE.
You’re ready to call the whole thing off and go to the Aran Islands by yourself instead.
Persevere. It’s all in the name of good times.
6. “Feck it, I deserve it, don’t I?”
All the daydreaming has solidified in your head. The organisation and stress is over. You have to go on this holiday. Throwing caution to the wind, you book it!
YOU’VE BOOKED IT!
7. “I’m so excited!”
Pure joy stage. The email lands in your inbox, confirming your booking. It’s the most beautiful email you’ve ever read. You’re consumed with sweet, sweet happiness.
Be careful, though. Not everyone can join in with your happiness. Beware the fact that to a lot of people, your excitement about your impending holiday might actually come off a bit like gloating. No one wants to veer into Rebecca Black levels of excitement. Rein it in, buddy.
8. “ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS THIS HOLIDAY”
Farewell to getting any work done. This is the stage during which you talk about nothing but your holiday. No one enjoys this stage but you. But don’t let that stop you, you’re going on HOLIDAY, who cares about the little people you leave behind.
Are you booking your holibobs soon? Make us jealous in the comments.