GOING TO THE BANK for yourself is a sure sign that you are An Adult.
But unfortunately, they don’t make it easy for you. Here are nine of the absolute WORST things about banking.
1. The opening hours
What do you mean, you can’t go between 10am and 4pm on a weekday? What are ‘weekends’?
A neat and cruel trick.
2. Setting aside a significant portion of your lunchtime to go
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Better bring a sandwich so.
3. Those bloody security doors
That all-encompassing gloom you feel as you witness somebody leaving while you try to enter, and you have to wait for their door to slowly, sloooowly swing shut before your green light can flash.
That.
4. Desperately seeking a human to help you with your task
Can’t you just go up to someone and tell them what you need? No. You can’t. It’s just not that simple.
5. Getting sent to the lodgement machines
Chirpy helper: “Hiya, how can we help you today?”
You: “I’m making a lodgement. *frantically thinking* Please don’t make me use the machines. PLEASE.”
Chirpy helper: “Can you step over to the lodgement machines?”
You:
6. Doing battle with said lodgement machines
These machines have very exacting standards, and will not accept:
- Any note with a fold in it
- Any note with no folds in it
- The new fivers
- But also the old fivers
- Any notes
Are you able to manage that? You better be.
7. Trying to change your address
Banking addresses can only be changed once a month under the full moon, and only if you give the bank a special security code that will be texted to your aunt.
Them’s the rules.
8. Being asked for your BIC/IBAN
HOW DARE YOU. That’s a very personal question.
